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Well I’m a little late on the March stat check but it’s not like there was a heck of a lot going on in the stats anyway. Compared to February, the month of March didn’t have much in terms of diversified search terms. In fact, about the only thing folks seemed to be searching for that lead them here was for that stupid maxi pad commercial with the water tower. I don’t know if this means they were as annoyed with it as I was or what, but the search strings indicate that there was…umm…heavy interest.

There were a few topics from the search string in February that I was going to touch on in posts through March, but obviously haven’t gotten to since it’s now April. Or rather, I started to but I ended up doing that wallpaper with the Atlanta city background and the Caprice and…it’s all Jack’s fault.

Who’s Jack you’re wondering? Muhahahaha…

In the mean time, here’s one thing from February that I wanted to yammer on about:

What REALLY happened to Glenn Miller?

One of the search strings back in February was for folks looking for the latest book that alledgedly tells of what REALLY happened to Glenn Miller the day he disappeared during WWII in 1944. This latest book, titled “I Kept My Word” is written by a gentleman who served in an American anti-aircraft battery in southern England and his story is that his unit accidentally shot down a small Allied aircraft in September of 1944. The commanding officer of the unit, upon “finding out” who was on board the plane and that had been killed, ordered everyone to remain silent about the incident. Nearly sixty-three years later, this gentleman decided to no longer remain silent.

First of all, I have no intention of purchasing this book and reading it because of one obvious glaring error. Glenn Miller was very much alive through September, October, November and the first 14 days of December of 1944. This is well documented through recorded radio programs, live performances, articles written, Miller’s own personal correspondence and photographs taken at the time. I don’t know what was shot down in September of ’44, but it was not GM’s plane.

Second, I’m make no judgement one way or the other that events indeed took place as this gentlement describes them, but I very much doubt he or his anti-aircraft unit had anything to do with the downing/disapperance of Miller’s particular plane. Afterall, as a result of the “friendly-fire” incident in September, his anti-aircraft battery was shipped to the continent just in time to take part in the Battle of the Bulge. Glenn Miller was last seen alive on December 15, 1944 when he boarded the single engine plane that was to take him to Paris. The Germans launched their offensive, and what would become known as the Battle of the Bulge, on December 16, 1944.

And so, “I Kept My Word” is merely another in a long line of supposed “truth” (truthiness?) of what really happened to Glenn Miller. The reason consipiracy theories and whathaveyou have endured and thrived all these years is simply because they can’t be completely confirmed or denied. Unfortunately, what really happened to Miller can’t be completely confirmed or denied either.

Thus, it haunts. It is generally accepted that the plane, due to mechanical failure or icing, went down in the English channel. That alone conjurs up some grim imagery. And by the time anybody realized that Miller was missing some three days later, the Germans were striking hard and fast in the Ardennes and pushing into Belgium. Therefore, any efforts at a search were, unfortuantely, not given high priority.

Meaning, unlike the news story back on April 1 about Amelia Earhart, and the possibility that something of her plane may be found on a uninhabitated island in the Pacific, there is little chance that anything of Miller or his plane will ever be found. And thus, the mystery will always remain.

And I’ll probably continue to yammer on about it because…well, I dig a good mystery. Heh. Considering my muses hail from a law enforcement perspective, is it any wonder?

As you know, I watch, rather religiously, the Colbert Report with Stephen Colbert on Comedy Central. However, I never have enough time during the week to catch the shows so I tape them (yes, I still use a VCR) and I watch the episodes on the weekend. I’ve dubbed this ritual “Saturdays With Stephen.” Well, yesterday I spent my Saturday With Stephen catching up on two weeks worth of episodes. Actually, it was only one week because this past week it turns out, he was on vacation. Again. I swear between school vacation weeks and every major Christian holiday, the man takes as much time off as he can. And why the hell not, he’s the one with the wildly successful television show. I’m just a poor sap blogger. 

Anyway! Two weeks ago, Stephen introduced his newest challenge to his audience (known collectively and with affection as the “Colbert Nation”), called “Stephen Colbert - Edited For Your Pleasure.” Now, to those of you out there familiar with the show, you know I don’t need to explain this challenge stuff. To those of you not familiar with it, it’s basically a chance for the audience of the show to take part in the program. Heh! Let’s see Bill O’Reilly do something like this. 

Last summer, Stephen had the “Green Screen Challenge,” where fans could take footage of him doing some slick Jedi knight moves against a green screen and edit him into whatever the hell they wanted. If I recall correctly the whole thing started because somebody out in the “internets” took the footage and just ran with it and somebody at Comedy Central thought, “BRILLIANT!” Thus, a concept was born. 

An additional concept on the Colbert Report is Stephen’s “Better Know a District” segment, in which he interviews congressional representatives from all over the country. The ultimate goal is to interview all 434 members of the House of Representatives. 

Of course, these interviews are serious, hard hitting, no holds barred, Lou Dobb’s inspired reporting. (It’s time to get to the truthiness.) Stephen pulls no punches. Sometimes he leaves the congressional rep completely speechless. 

(Actually, the interviews are complete shtick and are designed to fluster the congressional rep, who, for whatever reason, think they’re about to take part in a real and serious interview and end up in a complete farce and don’t know what exactly they should do, usually proving if nothing else, that they can be poor sports. But don’t tell Stephen that). 

Anyway, as a result of the no holds barred approach of Mr. Colbert, one member of the House is urging other members to not take part in the “Better Know a District” segment, claiming that Stephen has the luxury of editing the interviews to make the reps who go on the show look bad. Or worse. 

Well, in response, Stephen allowed himself to be interviewed and is challenging the members of Colbert Nation to take the footage from that interview and edit it to make Stephen look bad. Or worse. 

Now, I told you all that, to tell you all this… 

I have done a little, and I mean little, movie editing on my computer. Actually, about all I’ve achieved is putting some still pictures together in a nice slide show set to some music and editing some crappy video of me driving down the highway, again set to music. So, as I listened to the interview and to Stephens strategically answered questions, I was inspired. I went to ColbertNation.com, endured a 25 minute download, opened up Windows Movie Maker (because that’s all I’ve got) and….. 

I CAN’T EDIT THE $#&*!$%&ING FOOTAGE I DOWNLOADED!!!! ARGGGHH!!! Windows Movie Maker doesn’t recognize the .mov format. Why does it have to be in QuickTime format only?!?! @#$&%*^!! 

Stephen! Some of us aren’t as technologically savvy (or as rich) as you! Some of us don’t have our own television shows, inspiring millions of people! I have a blog and I inspire maybe six people on a good day. This footage couldn’t be made available in, say, .wmv format for the poorer members of Colbert Nation?! 

Argh. So, my inspiration was thus shot down in flames. *sniff* I still love ya, Stephen, but you sure know how to hurt a girl…

The calendar says spring, but winter isn’t going out quietly. Although I didn’t care to have to get up early this morning to shovel 6 – 8 inches of wet heavy snow, Mother Nature at least gave a beautiful backdrop for doing so by the time I left for work.